02 September 2012


     So much in my life has changed just even from the beginning of the year with the past post. At the time I was learning more about myself every day and finding that in order to find my lifelong happiness there had to be changes. Unfortunately transformation often does not come without some growing pains on your end and on those whose life your change will impact. No matter how hard you try to keep the pain to a bare minimum, people get hurt. My marriage was steadily growing less and less happy and more and more angry. At some point you have to either alter the direction of growth or accept what is and do your best at learning to be happy OR do your best to fix what is broken within you. For me, the best thing was to allow each of us to find happiness elsewhere. It was one of the most difficult decisions I've ever made and causing someone pain is something that is even harder to live with.
     While my marriage concluding has been the biggest change there have been others. I moved and have lived with my sister for a bit. I am going to Wisconsin this coming week, preparing and accepting more change. I had surgery and had my gallbladder removed. I am now a changed body without that organ. J The kids are growing so fast that sometimes when I have not seen them for a few days I am shocked at how big they are when I see them again. Julia has become a healthy, happy, losing her baby teeth, bi-lingual seven year old whom each time I look at I see the newborn I held and sang to. Bryce is a four year old adventurous, loving, bundle of energy. Each day he reminds me how daring children are at this age. Lauren is constantly learning, constantly surprising us and constantly giggling as most two year olds do. She brings laughs everyday as she contemplates and enjoys the world around her.
     I vowed in the last blog to become more diligent in my blogging, but then I do not think I could have. I had too much to repair that I could not express. While I shy away from making a promise of blogging daily, I do promise to blog more frequently. I need to record the kids’ lives and to record my own as I embark on new adventures. Life changes and we need to change with it……..

No comments: